The holidays aren’t just about candy canes and cheer, particularly for adults with ADHD. This time, often associated with the ‘Holiday Blues,’ can amplify the daily challenges faced by those with ADHD, potentially leading to increased feelings of anxiety or depression. Stress, unrealistic expectations, or bittersweet memories often fuel these feelings. But there’s a silver lining – with the right strategies, you can turn the season around.

1. Acknowledge the Blues: First, recognize that Holiday Blues is real, especially for adults with ADHD. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed by the festive frenzy. Understanding this can be your first step towards coping better.
2. Spot the Challenges: Just like a sudden rain can dampen a sunny day, unexpected holiday hurdles can catch you off guard. Identify these early – whether it’s a daunting family gathering or a mountain of holiday shopping. Keeping a journal can help you articulate and tackle these challenges head-on.
3. Confront Your Fears: Resilience is key. Face the holiday tasks that intimidate you, whether socializing at gatherings or planning events. Each challenge you overcome is a step towards building your resilience.
4. Spot the Silver Linings: Remember, resilience is your hidden superpower. Celebrate the small wins – like a meaningful mentorship or a compliment at work. These positives are your beacons of light, guiding you through tough times.
5. Seek Support: You’re not alone in this. Lean on friends, family, or professionals. Their support can make a significant difference, helping you find joy and peace this holiday season.

Don’t let the hustle and bustle overshadow your spirit this holiday season. It’s perfectly normal for adults with ADHD to have off days. See these as opportunities to build resilience. To gain a deeper understanding of what you might be facing, consider taking our Diagnostic Evaluation. This tool is designed to screen for ADHD as well as other conditions like anxiety, depression, Binge Eating Disorder, loneliness, and more, offering insights and strategies tailored to your unique needs.

Embrace the holiday season with knowledge, support, and the power to overcome challenges. Here’s to a season of growth, understanding, and cheer!

If you have a friend or family member who has ADHD, autism or other neurodivergent condition that causes a person’s brain to work a bit differently, you might be wondering what products, and holiday gifts, have been created with this population in mind. Below is an introduction to some common items available to help with the sensory challenges that many different learners face.

Fidget Spinners

Fidget spinners are perhaps the best known of the fidget toys and the product that started the fidget trend. These spinners can help those with autism who are experiencing sensory overload, but are also ideal for those with ADHD or anxiety issues. There are styles for both children and adults, and a wide range of colors and materials are available.

Sand, Slime and Putty

Sand, slime and putty all provide important sensory stimulation but also help to develop fine motor skills, which can sometimes be lacking in neurodivergent children. These substances can be used by themselves or as part of other games or activities. They come in different colors and scents to further engage a child’s senses.

Chewelry

This new term describes items that can provide important oral stimulation for teens and adults with ADHD, autism or other sensory issues. The products allow for that stimulation in a way that is discreet or socially acceptable. Chewable jewelry is made to be stylish or fashionable and can be constructed from a variety of materials, including silicone and braided cloth or rope. These chewables help to deal with sensory overload or to relieve boredom or anxiety.

Popper Toys

Popper toys can also provide opportunities for sensory play for adults, teens and children. They are portable, easy to clean, and are not too loud for those who are noise sensitive. People with autism or ADHD or other conditions can find the popping, squishing motions relaxing. There are many colors and styles to choose from. Amazon.com carries a wide variety of these toys.

Weighted Vests and Blankets

Weighted items such as vests and blankets are becoming increasingly popular, often recommended by therapists and special education teachers across the country. These items provide what is called “proprioceptive input” — which helps a person understand where their body is in space. Weighted vests and blankets provide deep pressure to a person’s joints and muscles, and can be calming and relaxing for many with ADHD and autism. Studies have also shown these products help with mental skills like focus and attention — something many neurodivergent individuals struggle with. People use compression vests, which provide deep pressure but without the weight, for a similar purpose.

Sensory Mats

These mats come in a wide range of textures. Children are able to explore them with their hands or feet. The textures are meant to help neurodivergent children engage their senses in a playful and relaxed way. The mats also help special needs children manage sensory input in an acceptable way.

Sensory Stickers

Similar to sensory mats, but smaller, portable and more discrete, these stickers come in a variety of textures. They can be stroked, scratched or scraped to provide sensory stimulation — without it being noticeable or distracting to others. These are inexpensive, come in a variety of styles and colors, and often have affirmations written on them to further induce a calming effect.

•••

There are many toys and sensory items that can help people deal with symptoms of their ADHD, autism or other neurodivergent condition. These items can help relieve anxiety, provide sensory stimulation and improve concentration and focus. They are great ideas for meaningful gift-giving.

Below are some resources offering more information on some of these sensory gifts. (These are only a handful of possible resources; ADHD Online does not recommend products and is not compensated in any way for providing this information):

Autism Parenting Magazine

Carmen B. Springee Autism Center of Learning

The Ability Toolbox

Chewelry: Stylish Sensory Chew Jewelry for Adults with Autism and ADHD

By Mary Fetzer

Clinically reviewed by Dr. Raafia Muhammad, MD, MPH

From Thanksgiving through the New Year, the hustle and bustle of the season are in high gear. For those with ADHD, the stress and excitement surrounding the holidays can be difficult. Experts offer their advice for getting everyone through the busiest time of the year.

“The holidays are a time for family, friends and fun but can be challenging for people with ADHD,” says psychiatrist Jeff Ditzell of New York City, who specializes in adult ADHD and life optimization coaching. “The festive season can have a significant impact on a person’s ability to think clearly and make decisions — and it can bring on feelings of pressure and stress that exacerbate ADHD symptoms.”

The holiday season involves planning, organizing, making lists and remembering important dates — things that can be difficult for people who have ADHD.

“ADHD is associated with challenges involving executive functioning skills, which include working memory, planning and prioritizing, organization, initiating tasks, impulse control and emotional control,” says Danielle Dellaquila, senior associate therapist at Gateway to Solutions, a goal-oriented therapy and counseling practice based in New York City.

The holidays often bring elevated expectations and a “so much to do, so little time” mentality. Women with ADHD, in particular, can be overwhelmed by the many boxes they want to check off, from party planning and decorating to cooking and present-buying. And research finds that women are particularly affected.

Surveys show that women still perform a much larger percentage of household tasks — including around the holidays — than men do. And a 2019 Harvard study in the journal American Sociological Review found that women also do more “cognitive labor” than their male counterparts; that is, they are more mentally involved in daily tasks. Specifically, women report anticipating family needs, figuring out how to fulfill these needs and monitoring their progress. The added tasks that accompany the holiday season only amplify this cognitive burden, particularly for women who have ADHD.

“The addition of visiting family, meal preparation and stimulating social gatherings can make it difficult for women with ADHD to remain focused, set priorities, anticipate changes and manage stress,” Ditzell says. “For this reason, women are more likely to feel isolated and uncertain about how they’re expected to handle situations that arise during this time.”

Even people who have successfully figured out how to manage their ADHD during the rest of the year can feel like they’re not in control when the holiday season arrives. But there are things you can do to make the holidays less stressful and more enjoyable for everyone. Here are some tips:

• Keep Up With Your Daily Routine

Routines are important to the ADHD brain, and it’s important to stick with them even when (especially when) schedules and tasks become intense.

“Maintaining your regular daily routines during hectic times can help you avoid unnecessary stress factors,” Ditzell says.

If you exercise on a regular basis, for example, aim to continue doing so throughout the holiday season. And stick to your regular sleep schedule to help improve focus and energy levels.

• Plan Ahead, Make Lists and Embrace Technology

Ditzell recommends creating a plan to stay on track during the holidays.

“Don’t wait until the last minute to buy a gift, plan a party or book holiday self-care appointments,” he says. “Plan them out so you can find extra time to relax and enjoy the season.”

Dellaquila recommends using calendars and technology to stay on top of holiday plans and dates.

“Set a reminder to discuss holiday plans with loved ones in advance so that you are not scrambling with the stress of last-minute plans,” she says.

Kimberly Vered Shashoua, a therapist at Vered Counseling in North Carolina and Texas, says her biggest tip for surviving the season is to outsource your brain to technology.

“Whether you use an app like ToDoist or rely on a smartwatch to give you notifications, having an external ‘brain’ to keep track of things and to remind you to do things when you need them can be a huge help,” she says.

• Set Small Goals

Dellaquila recommends that instead of baking all the cookies or buying all the gifts you need at once, focus on a few at a time so you don’t become too overwhelmed.

“Do small goals for many of your holiday tasks,” she says. “Instead of aiming to wrap fifty presents in one night, set aside time to wrap five gifts a day for ten days.”

• Establish Boundaries

And if even the small goals are causing stress, take a step back and evaluate the importance of your various holiday tasks. It’s likely that some things really aren’t necessary. No one can do it all, nor should they be expected to do so. One of the most effective things you can do to have a happy and successful holiday season is simply to slow down. That could mean declining an invitation to a holiday party or cutting back on the decorating.

“Think about the responsibilities you hold yourself to during the holidays and decide which are serving you and your family well,” Dellaquila says. “The holidays should be enjoyable: If something is causing you too much stress, then you should not feel guilty about saying no.”

• Take Care of Yourself

It’s easy to get so caught up in the holiday season that you forget to take care of yourself. Be aware of your ADHD symptoms — feeling frazzled or irritable or having difficulty staying focused on tasks — and address them when they start becoming unmanageable.

“While you may have lots of things to do, take some time out of your day for yourself to relax and recharge,” he says. “An enjoyable holiday workout, a visit to the spa or even just a good night’s sleep will help you deal with stressors that come up this time of year.”

• Keep Expectations Reasonable

It’s easy to get caught up in trying to make the holidays perfect, but perfection shouldn’t be the goal.

“The most important thing is that you enjoy the holidays and make memories with the people you love,” Dellaquila says. “Years from now, your kids won’t remember or care that you forgot to make their favorite potatoes or that you didn’t get them matching holiday pajamas. But they will remember if Mom was constantly stressed and in a bad mood during the holidays.”

Try not to sweat the small stuff during the holidays, she adds. “Keep in mind what the holidays are really about,” she says.

• Seek Professional Help

Families tend to spend more time together during the holidays, and family-related issues are common. Ditzell recommends seeking help from a psychiatrist or therapist if your family is experiencing holiday stress.

Resources:

The Guardian: Who Does the Housework?

American Sociological Review: The Cognitive Dimension of Household Labor

ToDoist.com

Here are five tips to set yourself up for a successful and relaxing holiday season:

1. Feeling overwhelmed with the number of people at the family gathering, or the barrage of small talk at a holiday party? It’s OK to take a minute (or five) to yourself. Don’t feel pressured to spend every moment with family and friends. We all need personal time to recharge, so stepping away is more than acceptable. 
2. Let go of work and school and try to focus on the present. It can be tempting to open your phone and check work emails between dinner courses or look ahead at post-holiday homework assignments, but your holiday break should be just that – a break. Try to be in the moment – and how you show that is up to you. It could be a long, lively conversation with a relative or enjoying family movie night. Make it a worthwhile and restful time for everyone involved.
3. Remind yourself that you deserve the time off. Take a moment and acknowledge that you work hard and have earned a restful holiday. This small step can make a world of difference for an anxious mind. But, of course, you always deserve time to rest, recharge and spend time doing the things that bring you pleasure, whether or not it’s the holidays. 
4. Avoid constant phone usage to prevent doomscrolling. The holidays should be a time to focus on friends, family, and relaxation. However, the world around us can be distracting, pushing news articles, tweets, and alerts to our phones at all hours of the day. Social feeds are designed to keep users scrolling through an endless amount of content. And with the 24-hour news cycle and a constant stream of upsetting headlines, it’s often best to put the phones away, focus on enjoying time together and catch up on the relevant news later. 
5. Stay within your comfort zone this holiday season. Friends and family may have a lengthy list of what they want to do over the holidays, ranging from annual traditions like cookie decorating to more extraneous activities like caroling through the neighborhood. While these activities are fun, it’s important to know that you don’t need to do everything and should vocalize if there’s something that you don’t want to do or don’t have the energy for. Family and friends will understand, and it gives you time to recharge for the next fun holiday festivity. 

Don’t let the holiday season get in the way of your mental health. While it’s a time filled with so many opportunities, remember to take a much-needed rest with loved ones and enter the new year refreshed and ready for what’s next. 

The entire ADHD Online team wishes you a safe and relaxing holiday season! 

The holidays are here — Halloween just passed and now it’s pumpkin spice everything with Thanksgiving and Christmas around the corner. 

With ADHD, routine and schedule are very important. You know some things are going to happen no matter what:

• work timing and events
• kids at school with extra activities and with friends outside of school
• the bedtime routine should stay set but there’s so much going on tha

This predictability helps to reduce anxiety and create a sense of control. However, when it comes to organizing holidays with ADHD, the excitement can sometimes lead to overwhelm. Creating a detailed plan with timelines and checklists can make the process smoother and more enjoyable.

With the holidays the problem is that this creates a disruption in routine. The way to combat it is to plan ahead. 

1. Develop a STRONG sleep routine. This should include the same time for sleep and wake-up with no electronics for an hour prior to going to sleep. The bedroom should only be used for sleep and when it is bedtime, the room should be cool, dark, and quiet. It may be helpful to have a smartwatch to help track sleep patterns. 
2. Designate a spot. This spot is for all important items (keys, wallet, etc..) in the house. Create a routine that ensures the designated spot becomes a part of your focus. 
3. Keep a planner. This can be digital or in paper form. As with the above recommendation, create a routine that the planner helps you focus on how to schedule daily activities. 
4. Create a list of priorities. These should be listed from most important to least important. Keep the list in the planner or designated spot–work the list from most important to least. If some tasks are too big, break them down into smaller steps. 
5. Take breaks. Try to pace projects to the span of attention that is average. Take a break once that time has passed and regroup after 5 or so minutes. It can also be helpful to use a watch alarm to vibrate when you have to refocus. There is a timer app on Apple Watch or iPhone. 

TRIGGERS

Figure out what your triggers are. If you know kids will be home from school for 2 weeks in December, hire a babysitter to watch them while you work. Even if you have 2 hours of work to do, the fact the kids are busy and taken care of takes a huge burden off your shoulders.

With kids being home, there could be more home chores for them to do like more laundry, dishes, and helping keep things picked up. And you know there will be more grocery runs. Kids need snacks, so to help with this use Amazon Prime or another delivery service to order groceries in advance. Maybe ask the babysitter for an hour more to help fold laundry or put the dishes away. At work, we often delegate tasks, why not at home? 

I don’t like the saying “lower your standards”. It has a negative connotation. I wouldn’t say ‘lower your standards”, I would say “make your own”. Who’s to say you need a table full of food? Your kids will appreciate anything you do—it’s quality and not quantity that’s important. 

You’ll be amazed how much happier your whole family is when you reduce the pressure to be perfect. Focus on setting your own standards.  

TOP TIP – Limit time on social media.

Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, YouTube, and TikTok are designed to capture and keep your attention. Seeing too many “curated” views of life can create a sense of guilt and diminish your efforts. Instead, give yourself time away from the screen to be present for those around you. You’ll all be glad you did. 

TRAVEL ADVICE

If you know you’ll be traveling, see your provider and share your itinerary to determine if an adjustment to your medication is needed. Maybe a shorter-acting medication can be sufficient versus a long-acting. 

ADHD is not a lifelong struggle—it’s just at times like these you might need some extra help. 

What advice can we share? It’s about closing the tabs—the mental hyperactivity, and how you can help close those tabs so they don’t become a burden. 

1. Open up your suitcase and pack as you go
2. Use travel cubes. These help keep things organized
3. Get all the medicines/travel-friendly items you may need at durationhealth

Travel hacks for kids: 

1. Screen time. It’s ok for them to have screen time for that time period. Make sure you have kids safe headphones
2. Get travel friendly coloring kits
3. Sticker sets can keep them engaged 
4. Pillbox with snacks that are color-coded for kids
5. Let them pack their own suitcase or backpack—it’s the sense of belonging and responsibility. 
6. Send some kid items to your final destination—-use amazon prime to send things like diapers, formulas, snacks, wipes so you don’t have to worry about wagging it all along with you. 

Other ideas for kids and the holidays

• Put disposable cameras around the house and let your kids take pictures and then develop them. This becomes a fun activity for them. 
• Playdough will always keep them busy. Be sure to set an old sheet or cloth down underneath so you aren’t stressing about everywhere the Playdough goes. 
• Dollar General and The Dollar Store often have great items for kids, like stickers, activity books, crayons, coloring pencils, and to-go plastic containers. Check out a store near you. 
• In the end, enjoy the moment and be present. 

PRODUCTS WE LIKE

• Magnetic stickers: these are imaginative and easy to clean up— especially on a plane.
• Reusable stickers:
  • Baby Shark 
  • Melissa and Doug Reusable Stick Set
• Puffy stickers: fun to make cards or creative imagination. Sensory trigger
• Travel-friendly kid medicine kit
• Timercap: tells you the last time you opened the medication 

While many celebrate the arrival of the holiday season, it can have a somber effect on others. Known as the “Holiday Blues,” this time of year can bring about temporary feelings of anxiety or depression triggered by additional stress, unrealistic expectations, or sad memories that accompany the season. It’s likely that, at some point, you or someone you care about has had a less than enjoyable holiday experience. 

That’s why we want to take time to recognize the resiliency that lies within each of us. Resiliency is our ability to bounce back from difficulties. At ADHD Online, we help people find their own strengths each day. Those who are diagnosed with ADHD face difficulties that can set them back or make the day harder than it was intended to be. By tapping into our inner resiliency, we can make it through the day and overcome any holiday blues that may come along. 

If you find yourself dreading the holiday season, here are some tips to help warm the winter chill and build resiliency:  

Identify the Obstacles: 

Whether a sunny day turns to rain, or one homework question turns into 20, the sooner you identify obstacles that stand in your way, the easier it will be to find a solution to conquer them. Many times, half the battle is simply knowing what you’re up against. When faced with struggles, take a step back, give words to your challenge (i.e. “I am frustrated because this homework assignment is more difficult than I was prepared for.”), and refocus on the task at hand. If you struggle to give words to your emotions, try starting a journal and simply keep note of what is happening in your life. This is a practice called “free writing” and it will help you tap into your feelings. 

Face Your Fears: 

A key to building resiliency is facing the things that challenge us. While this can be difficult or scary, this is how we grow and develop fortitude. Continue to recognize obstacles that stand in your way when they occur and don’t back down from them. Keep trying and finding solutions to how you can achieve your goals. During the holidays this may mean striking up a conversation with a coworker during the office potluck or sitting down with your family members to plan out Thanksgiving dinner. Taking on tasks that make us uncomfortable builds our resiliency and our skillset.  

Look for the Positives: 

Resiliency is a superpower and one that takes time to build. To increase your resiliency, focus on the good in your life. Maybe classes have been difficult this fall, but you’ve cultivated a strong mentorship with your teacher. Maybe you’ve been passed over for a promotion at work, but your boss gave you praise during the last company meeting. No matter what you are going through, remember that the bad times won’t last forever and there can be silver linings once you start to look for them. 

Get Connected: 

You shouldn’t tackle the holiday blues, or any mental health concerns, alone. Lean on your support system when you feel down. This can be friends, family, classmates, or a mental health professional. By seeking help early, you’ll be able to tap into resources and have a more joyful holiday season. If you don’t know where to start, let us help – take our comprehensive assessment today. 

This holiday season don’t let candy canes and crowds trigger your holiday blues. It’s okay to have an off day but try to use this time to build your resiliency.