June is Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month — the perfect time for men everywhere to pause and reflect on how they’re truly feeling. It’s also Father’s Day this month, when we show appreciation for all the hard work and dedication that goes into one of the most important job titles.

Fathers can be a selfless bunch, putting their child’s development and success ahead of their own. And for dads living with ADHD, balancing fatherhood and mental health can be both a challenge and an opportunity. Here are some tips for becoming the best dad you can be, along with the best version of yourself.

Start with treatment

The reality is: Of more than 15 million adults diagnosed with ADHD, nearly 56% are men. So “the first step in improving your parenting skills is to make sure you are receiving adequate treatment for your ADHD,” says Terry M. Dickson, M.D., founder and director of The Behavioral Medicine Clinic of NW Michigan, which serves children, adolescents, and adults with ADHD. “You can’t help your child if you don’t first help yourself.”

Make healthy choices

Prioritizing sleep, regular physical activity, and healthy eating won’t just help you transform that dad bod (though it will certainly do that), it will also ensure that you’re functioning optimally and make tackling fatherhood and ADHD that much easier.

Sleep: Treat it as an appointment. Set a bedtime (does that sound familiar?) and wake-up time and stick to them. Identify any to-dos you need to complete before bed and buffer in some time to complete them before turning in.

Exercise: It usually feels like one more thing to fit into an already busy schedule. So start small, maybe with regular walks or using cardio equipment that lets you watch an episode of that show you’re binging while you exercise.

Nutrition: The hard truth is that it’s easier to eat poorly than to eat well. But with so many things, preparation is the key to success. Consider meal planning at the start of each week, even if it’s just breakfast or lunch. You’ll be less tempted to reach for that bag of chips if you already have healthy items ready to go.

Carve out “dad time”

Quality time is the bedrock of any parent/child relationship. Set aside time to meaningfully connect with your child — free of distractions (seriously, put it down). Do an activity you both enjoy or focus on skill-building.

If your child has ADHD (it often runs in families), use this time to teach them techniques that have helped you – maybe things you wish you’d learned at their age. These could be anything from tips for completing homework on time to becoming a better listener in class. 

And speaking of listening, use this time to do just that. Actively listen to their questions and concerns. That way, your child will know they have a safe, judgment-free environment where they’re comfortable communicating openly.

Check your ADHD symptoms

If you’re experiencing symptoms of ADHD, especially if it’s impacting your relationship with your child, you have options. Learn more about our clinically validated Mental Health Diagnostic Evaluation^* that screens for ADHD and other potentially co-occurring conditions like anxiety, depression, and more. 

Being a dad is hard enough work, so anything you can do to make it a little easier will go a long way for you (and them).

References

Men’s Mental Health
CHADD
ADDitude Magazine

This article was clinically reviewed by Valerie Snyder, LVN, Mental Wellness Coach

^* The Mentavi Mental Health Diagnostic Evaluation is clinically validated for the diagnosis of ADHD in adults. Study results were presented at the 10th World Congress on ADHD in May 2025.

¹ https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9969349

Antiquated but true: In the realm of healthcare, women often take the lead, ensuring their partners stay on top of everything from dental checkups to colonoscopies. Women frequently display exemplary assertiveness, and men benefit significantly from the June-Cleaver-level attention that’s keeping them healthy. 

On behalf of all men who should be taking care of their own damn selves, thank you.

Speaking of June… June is Men’s Mental Health Month. When it comes to mental health, too many men are stuck in the Leave it to Beaver era. The whole family suffers when sensitive topics go undiscussed. This June, it’s vital for men (and women, please and thank you) to be proactive about men’s mental health.

Cancers vs Answers

A noticeably changing forearm splotch sparks a maybe-you-should-get-that-looked-at conversation.  If men never ask about mental health, mental health symptoms go unanswered. Colonoscopy awareness ramps up at age 50 (earlier if there’s a family history of colon cancer). Scatolgical humor may even spur colonoscopy prep talk among dude-friends. #BottomsUp! But mental health is different. Men actively avoid conversations about feelings or less tangible symptoms like restlessness, challenges with concentration, or impulsivity.

Procrastination, itself a potential symptom of ADHD, may lead men to miss a lifetime of opportunities to seek help. ADHD is often viewed as a childhood affliction (another emasculating stigma). If an ADHD diagnosis is missed in boyhood when surrounded by teachers and counselors, having a close, loving, keen observer recommend assessment could be the only hope to get loved ones on board for treatment. This is especially necessary when symptoms manifest not as hyperactivity but as inattentiveness. Markers like forgetfulness, making careless mistakes and being easily distracted get missed all too often. 

Time for a Tune-Up?

Just as prostate issues often carry a stigma, mental health issues like ADHD are similarly shrouded in embarrassment and misunderstanding. Yet, ADHD is not a personal failing but a condition rooted in neurobiological factors that can be effectively managed—much like fixing a flooded transmission or troubleshooting a smartphone. In fact, one good strategy is to frame mental health conversations around an analogy like needing a software update. ADHD treatment can involve recalibrating how your brain processes dopamine, akin to refreshing your device’s operating system. An ADHD assessment is no different than taking your mental software to the Genius Bar. And if your spouse/boyfriend/relationship runs better after that, you’ll only wish you’d had a conversation sooner.  

Sound like anyone you know? Other signs of ADHD, according to the National Institute of Mental Health, include: 

• Answering questions before they are asked completely 
• Difficulty listening closely when spoken to directly 
• Losing things such as keys, wallets, and phones
• Being unable to engage quietly in leisure activities
• Talking excessively
• A preference for quick fixes rather than taking the steps needed to gain greater rewards

Dude, Try Self-Awareness

Of course, men should take charge of their own mental health needs. They should reflect on their own well-being and consider whether symptoms like chronic procrastination or difficulty completing tasks indicate something more than just typical stress or fatigue.  Did you know Mental Wellness Coaching is a thing? Once your partner partners with the proper clinical support, ongoing engagement and coaching with regular check-ins, take the handholding responsibility off your plate.

It’s Personal, and It’s Personal

Consider the story of a couple whose relationship is affected by symptoms of undiagnosed ADHD. Delving into a topic that may feel too personal for all the Ward Cleavers out there may pay healthy dividends. What starts as an online assessment could lead to a deeper understanding of how ADHD is impacting daily life for you both. So it’s perfectly reasonable to initiate this tough, loving, personal mental health conversation for your own personal, purely selfish mental health reasons. Thank you again, and happy June. 

Almost a decade later, Emmanuel discovered he was also autistic and he struggled with this news going through bouts of depression and denial. His search for answers led him to the support he needed to accept his dual diagnosis. Through humility and growth, Emmanuel became an advocate for Autism and ADHD awareness, actively engaging with organizations like ADDA and addressing mental health stigmas within the African-American community.

Today, he pursues the work he’s passionate about as a freelance writer, speaker, and voiceover artist and has been contributing his talents in the form of short audio stories for NeuroClassic’s SoundCloud channel, sharing his unique perspective to help foster understanding.

Listen in to hear Emmanuel share more about his journey with ADHD and Autism, about the importance of connection for the neurodiverse community, and how the progress that’s been made in the neurodivergent community over the last decade is inspiring him to look forward to the future. 

Refocused, Together is a collection of 31 stories told throughout the 31 days of October, a part of our commitment to ADHD Awareness Month. Make sure to subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts so you don’t miss a single story this month! 

Connect with Emmanuel on LinkedIn, read his latest work here and listen to the work he’s created for NeuroClassic on SoundCloud! 

READ: Embrace Autism | Autistic & ADHD Traits

READ: CHADD | ADHD and Autism Spectrum Disorder

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By Kaitlyn Pfiester

ADHD impacts the part of the brain that controls your ability to plan, focus and execute ideas. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reports that 13% of boys are diagnosed with ADHD. Some will outgrow it, but others will not, meaning plenty of men are dealing with ADHD into retirement.

Women have unique issues with ADHD as they age as well, of course. And we covered a bit of that last week. But men with ADHD can have special issues in retirement. This article will focus on them.

Symptoms of ADHD in older men

ADDitude Magazine notes that ADHD symptoms often flare up after midlife. The issue is that many ADHD symptoms, such as memory problems, shorter attention spans and other symptoms, can also be attributed to aging.

So how can you tell the difference?

The mental health field is still working to improve awareness and understand the difference between the two. However, this is where knowing yourself and examining your life can help. If you had ADHD-like symptoms before retirement or as you hit middle age, there is a higher chance that ADHD is to blame. Some of these symptoms (for men in particular), according to PsychCentral.com, are:

• Interrupting conversations or speaking out of turn
• Fidgeting or an inability to sit still
• Disruptive behavior
• Absentmindedness (forgetting parts of conversations, listening without retaining information)
• Relationships issues
• Lying to cover up inadequacies (such as low work performance or struggling to plan)

These symptoms may have been a part of your life for years. However, getting older may bring them to your attention as they worsen. Asking the opinion of loved ones, especially a spouse or close friend, can help determine the difference.

Seven tips for men with ADHD in retirement

1. Create a flexible routine: Many men with ADHD, upon retirement, feel a keen sense of relief at no longer having to stick to a schedule. Your brain may enjoy the lack of structure, but not having a routine can cause you to forget to take care of yourself and your relationships, which can cause additional strain and stress. Try using sticky notes to remind yourself of your responsibilities and timers to keep you from losing track of time.
2. Take advantage of your hyperfocus: Work on what you want to work on and lean into your hyperfocus. To-do lists are often ranked based on urgency and priorities. However, don’t be afraid to challenge where a task lands on your list. You may get more done by concentrating on your hyperfocus before moving on.
3. Eat breakfast and care for yourself: Your brain needs fuel to function. WebMD notes that skipping breakfast can worsen your symptoms, so be intentional about this important meal.
4. Understand your triggers: Certain activities or situations, such as stress, lack of sleep or noisy environments, may worsen your symptoms. Try taking note of when you find this happening so that you will be mentally prepared in the future.
5. Create steps and rewards for projects: While most studies exploring this issue have focused on children with ADHD, a study published in the Journal of Attention Disorders explored the question of how small rewards might affect the performance of adults with ADHD on congnitive tests. The study found both positive and negative effects. It found that participants with ADHD tended to show less inattention with rewards. But the study also found increased hyperactivity with rewards for adults with ADHD. Still, there might be some benefits to using rewards. Try outlining what needs to get done and splitting it up into sections. Each time a section is complete, reward yourself.
6. Be social: While it can be challenging to keep up with relationships when you have ADHD, interacting with others is essential for your mental health. Focus on developing close relationships with a few people who understand you. Group activities can be fun, but if you find they cause stress, it’s okay to pass on those opportunities and focus more on intimate relationships.
7. Seek treatment: Treatment for ADHD can be challenging for seniors of both genders because many physicians struggle to tell the difference between ADHD and old age. However, if you think you may have ADHD, try seeking help through a mental health professional, preferably one specializing in ADHD. They will know to help you navigate and manage your symptoms regardless of the diagnosis.

By Cathy Cassata

Traumatic events can happen to anyone. Sexual assault, physical abuse, natural disasters, witnessing or being a victim of violence, or the tragic death of a loved one are just a few examples of traumatic occurrences.

When people experience these events, they may be left with physical, mental and emotional symptoms immediately afterwards that manifest as shock and denial. They may also experience long-term effects of trauma that occur down the line, such as unpredictable emotions, flashbacks, strained relationships, and headaches or nausea, according to the American Psychological Association.

“All of us can have overwhelming experiences in life, but when we talk about trauma, we are talking about those overwhelming experiences not getting resolution and not getting worked through on the nervous system level,” explains Tonya L. Miles, PsyD, a psychologist practicing in Overland Park, Kan.

The effect of trauma is mitigated based on the age and developmental level of a person at the time it occurred, she adds. “Certainly, it’s going to affect children in a very different way than adults because their brains and nervous systems are developing,” Miles says.

Trauma and ADHD also have some very specific associations.

First, having ADHD can be a contributing factor to being exposed to trauma.

“One of the big complicating factors is that people who have ADHD … tend to die at an earlier age, and tend to get into more auto accidents, and tend to have more injuries related to the ADHD (due to) their inattention and impulsivity,” says Miles. “Kids with ADHD that is primarily untreated, tend to use drugs at an earlier age, tend to have higher rates of premarital sex. All this can set the stage for more potential traumatic events to happen.”

Higher trauma scores associated with ADHD

A 2017 study in Academic Pediatrics found that kids with ADHD had more adverse childhood experiences, or ACEs, compared to children without ADHD.

ACEs are potentially traumatic events that occur in childhood, such as abuse, neglect and witnessing violence. The researchers found a significant association between ACE score, and moderate to severe ADHD. The study looked at children whose parents indicated presence and severity of ADHD, and their child’s exposure to nine ACEs. It found that children with ADHD had a higher prevalence of each ACE compared with children without ADHD.

“It is well known that those who have experienced trauma are more likely to experience more significant symptoms of ADHD,” says Dr. Ami Baxi, a psychiatrist at Lenox Hill Hospital in New York City. “One should assess for a history of trauma as it can often be a predisposition to ADHD.”

She adds that traumatic experiences can also exacerbate ADHD symptoms.

And symptoms of trauma can often be confused with symptoms of ADHD, Baxi says. For instance, symptoms of both conditions include:

• Trouble with concentration
• Memory issues
• Emotional dysregulation
• Sleep disturbances
• Impulsivity and/or restlessness
• Difficulty establishing and maintaining relationships
• Substance abuse

A mental health professional can help you determine why you’re experiencing these symptoms and how to best manage them.

Four Tips for Dealing with Trauma

If you are experiencing symptoms of trauma, with or without ADHD, consider the following tips:

• Know that trauma is treatable

You shouldn’t view trauma symptoms as incurable and something you’ll have to deal with for the rest of your life. Miles stresses that symptoms of trauma are treatable.

“An important part of treating trauma is nervous system regulation and managing our activation levels so that we’re not in high-anxiety states,” she says. “Nervous system regulation sounds trite, but things like deep breathing turn on a relaxation response in the body, so learning strategies that help you feel more calm, safe, and comfortable can help.”

• Engage in movement

While movement is helpful for people who have hyperactivity, Miles says it can also help the brain process more effectively when your nervous system is activated.

“If people are in a car accident, they might start shaking and people will say: ‘Oh, they’re cold,'” Miles says. “But it’s not the cold; it’s the nervous system trying to release the activation in the body. So it’s the body saying: ‘I need to get rid of all that adrenaline that is pumping.'”

Moving your body stimulates your vagus nerve, which regulates internal organ functions, such as heart and respiratory rates.

• Connect with others

Because humans are wired for connection with other people to feel a sense of belonging and safety, Miles says, building relationships can ease the effects of trauma.

“However, it’s necessary to be comfortable and not overwhelmed by connection because trauma is often at the hands of other people. And so you might not feel safe with other people,” she says.

And relationships can be difficult, of course, for those with ADHD.

“Sitting still long enough to connect and engage can be hard,” Miles says. “Also, difficulty managing emotions, which is an ADHD symptom, can often create complications in relationships.”

Building relationships and connection in small amounts as you build trust is a healthy approach, Miles says.

• Get help from a mental health professional

People who have ADHD often have other mental health issues, including anxiety and depression. For that reason, it’s important that people get a proper assessment of their mental health, Miles says.

“Some people may not realize that they are experiencing symptoms of trauma,” she says. “They may think it’s anxiety or it’s just part of the ADHD because it can be hard to differentiate between the two.”

Gaining an understanding can help adjust expectations and treatment goals.

Baxi says the first-line treatment for ADHD is most often medications, including stimulants. But, she says, psychotherapy can also be effective.

“Psychotherapy can play a role in addressing the role of trauma in ADHD symptom presentation,” she says. She cites cognitive behavioral therapy — which helps people identify and change negative thought patterns that influence their behavior — and somatic therapy — which treats mental health issues through a focus on the mind-body connection.

“Specifically, trauma-focused cognitive behavioral therapy and somatic psychotherapy have been found to be helpful in addressing a history of trauma,” Baxi says.

Sources:

Academic Pediatrics: Associations Between Adverse Childhood Experiences and ADHD Diagnosis and Severity

The Jed Foundation: Understanding Emotional Trauma

American Psychiatric Association: What is ADHD?

Statistics seem to show ADHD rates are higher among men — though many experts believe girls and women with ADHD are underdiagnosed. But less is known about whether men and women live with ADHD in the same way. How men experience and perceive ADHD symptoms can impact how they respond to them, and may make it more difficult for them to seek diagnosis and treatment.

Differing perceptions of ADHD symptoms

People sometimes view ADHD symptoms differently in men and women. “Men might have even been rewarded for the traits that come with ADHD, such as someone at home cleaning up or doing their laundry because they can’t seem to get to it,” says Sanam Hafeez, a New York state licensed psychologist and director of Comprehend the Mind. “Fast talking and interrupting, taking up airspace, can also be rewarded when men do it, whereas women can be perceived as pushy or aggressive.”

Daniel Wysocki, Ed.S., a therapist and psychological examiner who focuses on diagnosing and treating ADHD, agrees adolescent impulsivity and lack of self-control may be rewarded in males, or viewed as a normal phase of development. “It’s something they used to take pride in, or others would celebrate,” he says.

Symptoms and responses to them

Men may also experience and react differently to ADHD symptoms. Wysocki says many men can compensate for their difficulties at work, but their daily routines outside of work are often most affected. Like Hafeez, Wysocki notes this can be most evident at home.

“Men with ADHD can quickly become overwhelmed by multi-step tasks, including laundry, cooking and other household chores,” he says. “Since there has traditionally been less emphasis on men caring for their homes, this is often an overlooked area of impairment. There is denial and shame about these being signs of dysfunction, due to the perceived division of men’s and women’s responsibilities.”

Hafeez says men may feel more defensive about their abilities. “Relationships are also impacted as many men feel ‘nagged’ about all the things they don’t get done,” she says.

Ryan Bolling, behavior analyst and CEO of Atlanta-based Bolling Behavioral Consulting, says many men are not diagnosed until adulthood because they’ve been able to mask their symptoms throughout childhood and adolescence. “This can lead to a lot of shame and denial when they finally realize they do have ADHD,” she says.

Furthermore, she says, men may be more likely to act out in impulsive ways or engage in risky behaviors. “This can obviously cause problems both for the individual and those around him,” she says.

Jeremy Schumacher, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Milwaukee, Wisc., says he often sees men with ADHD who are struggling to manage their emotional responses. He says he also often sees “men who have poor food habits, who are either overweight or way overcompensating with a fitness lifestyle.”

Barriers to getting assessed

Men may also experience different obstacles to getting an ADHD assessment, one of which is the stereotype that hyperactivity is a consistent ADHD symptom. This can lead to less awareness of other symptoms. “Many men don’t realize that emotional reactivity, sensory issues or poor eating habits can all be symptoms of underlying ADHD,” Schumacher says.

Men may also avoid getting assessed for ADHD because they don’t want to admit there might be something wrong, Bolling says. “This can be a major problem because untreated ADHD can lead to all sorts of issues at work, in relationships, and in other areas of life,” she says.

Hafeez says she has seen an uptick in both adult men and women seeking ADHD diagnosis and treatment in recent years. However, “in my personal clinical experience, I see more women seeking assessments after (they learn) women are underdiagnosed from articles or social media posts,” she says. “Men will usually seek an evaluation because of difficulties at work, or because a spouse or partner encourages it.”

Wysocki says the belief that ADHD is a child’s disorder, or a “boys will be boys attitude,” can deter men from getting evaluated. “Most people with ADHD are highly capable, intelligent and driven to success and can mask their difficulties,” he says. “At least until their symptoms are aggravated by their environment.”

Responses to diagnosis

Men can have a wide range of responses to receiving an ADHD diagnosis. Some may find it hard to discover symptoms that were rewarded or viewed as normal could have been early signs of a disorder, says Wysocki. “Not only are they suffering from these issues, but they are having to re-think who they are as a person,” he says. “Being correctly diagnosed with ADHD can be an emotional turning point. It is difficult to cope with learning they might have found a more successful life if they received early diagnosis and treatment.”

Schumacher says many men he works with are relieved to get a diagnosis — because they’ve struggled for so long. “Finally having an answer as to why it’s been so hard is a huge relief,” he says.

Reasons to seek help

Shame and denial can make it difficult for men to seek help for ADHD, Wysocki says. He suggests two ways to overcome these feelings: education and taking the first step towards getting evaluated. He notes ADHD is not a fictional disorder, but a well-studied, persistent problem within the functional systems of the brain.

“The consequences of untreated ADHD are severe,” he says. “If you continue to feel shame and guilt over a possible diagnosis, you can carry these feelings and still complete a comprehensive assessment. Every day we do things that make us uncomfortable or cause distress. Once you’ve completed the evaluation, you can make an informed decision about your treatment options. It is confidential and private.”

Schumacher agrees getting assessed is crucial, as is finding expert help. “Many professionals still think of ADHD as only hyperactivity or procrastination and miss many of the daily symptoms that give people with ADHD the most trouble,” he says.

“It can be so discouraging to try as hard as you can and not make any progress,” Schumacher says. “An expert can help men understand what works for their brain, and where their individual struggles around ADHD are based.”

And, Schumacher adds: “On a hopeful note, men who have managed their ADHD into adulthood have so many positive coping skills they’ve built up over time — often unknowingly. Being neurodiverse in a neurotypical society is tough, and the resilience and outside-the-box thinking men with ADHD have to tap into growing up are great strengths in continuing to manage ADHD for the rest of their lives.”

Sources:

Asian Journal of Psychiatry: Gender-based differences in prevalence and effects of ADHD in adults: A systematic review

CHADD: General Prevalence of ADHD

CDC: Data and Statistics About ADHD

By Brian Wu, MD, PhD

With Father’s Day rolling around again, men all over the country are likely to be thinking about fatherhood and what it means to be a dad. If you are a guy with ADHD, though, parenting can be a bit more of a challenge.

In fact, a study in the journal Parenting, Science, and Practice noted that “(h)igher levels of fathers’ ADHD symptoms predicted more inconsistent discipline, low involvement, and a low level of supportive and a high level of non-supportive responses to children’s negative emotions.”

Still, having ADHD does not mean that you cannot build a strong, healthy and loving parent-child relationship. Here are some tips to make the challenges of fatherhood with ADHD easier to overcome.

Treat Your ADHD

If your ADHD is being treated successfully — whatever that looks like for you — then parenting challenges are going to be a little easier. “The first step in improving your parenting skills is to make sure you are receiving adequate treatment for your ADHD,” Terry M. Dickson, M.D., founder and director of The Behavioral Medicine Clinic of NW Michigan that serves children, adolescents and adults with ADHD, writes in ADDitude Magazine. “You can’t help your child if you don’t first help yourself.”

These treatments can often include medication, counseling/coaching, or lifestyle changes. Lifestyle changes might include meditation, regular exercise, and a diet rich with proteins or Omega-3 fatty acids.

Choose Your Environment Wisely

Many of those with ADHD can have a hard time focusing on any one thing when there are many distractions in the environment. When you spend quality time with your child, make sure that it is not in a situation where you can’t focus strictly on your child. This could look different for different families, but sharing story time before bed or taking a walk in a quiet natural area after school or on weekends would be two good ways to build that distraction-free space to get close to your child.

Make the Time

Time management can be difficult for ADHD dads. But if and when you do manage it, it can really pay off for you as a parent.

“Children, in a sense, spell love T-I-M-E,” writes Dickson. So make sure that you carve time into your weekly schedule that you actually spend with your child. And when you make the commitment to an activity, make sure you follow through so that you are able to build trust — an important element in the parent-child bond.

Make Self-Help Skills Part of the Parenting Plan

Particularly if your own child has ADHD as well (and this condition often runs in families), then teaching him or her self-help skills early on can help to mitigate the negative impact that ADHD can have even at an early age.

Were there things — such as getting homework done on time — that you struggled with as a child ? If you see your own child struggling with these same things, share the benefits of your wisdom and tell them about your own challenges and what worked for you. This can help them overcome obstacles; it can also give them a better understanding of obstacles you’ve overcome yourself.

ADHD dads can bring a creativity and energy to parenting that can be a great benefit for them and their children. Following these tips to help mitigate the potential down sides to parenting with this condition can make it even easier to have a nurturing and healthy parent-child bond.

Assessing Symptoms to Check for ADHD

Some fathers may exhibit symptoms that suggest they might have ADHD — symptoms that affect their relationship with their children. But they may not have been assessed for ADHD. If that’s the case with you, you should seriously consider getting an ADHD assessment. Knowing that you have ADHD — and understanding how to treat it — will be a huge benefit in your relationship with your children.

Sources:

Parenting, Science and Practice

ADDitude Magazine

Centers for Disease Control

CHADD

About two years ago, I essentially banned myself from Facebook because I totally lose track of time while I’m scrolling through. Every single time, and then I emerge an hour or two later, horrified when I see how much time I’ve just wasted. That’s how it is when you have ADHD and time blindness. If you’re not careful, a good chunk of your day can slip away before you know it.

Understanding Time Blindness

Time is an issue for most people who have ADHD. In a presentation to parents of kids with ADHD back in 2009, Russell A. Barkley, Ph.D., infamously said that “ADHD is … time blindness.” That definitely struck a chord for me.

Time blindness means you have absolutely no concept of time. No idea how long tasks take, no clue what time it is without consulting a clock, no perception of how many minutes have actually passed. Time is subjective. And if it’s not melting away faster than snowflakes falling on a campfire, it’s crawling along like a crocodile with a full belly.

Susan Ciardiello, Ph.D., LCSW, an ADHD coach and psychotherapist in New York and New Jersey, explains that time blindness is an ADHD trait that involves chronic lateness and a poor sense of time — “or ETA — the estimated time of anything,” she says, laughing. “You don’t have a realistic sense of how long things should take or how much time has passed when you’re engaged in an activity.”

According to Nikki Kinzer, a Professional Certified Coach, an ADHD coach and founder of TakeControlADHD.com, people who experience time blindness see time as fluid, without a beginning or an end. “You don’t have a good sense of how fast or slow time is going,” she says. “It’s almost like time doesn’t exist unless you are looking at it.”

Why Time Blindness Affects People With ADHD

Most people with ADHD have difficulty with executive function. Ciardiello says this is a set of skills that includes:

• Planning and prioritizing
• Time management
• Working memory
• Organizing tasks and materials
• Initiating tasks and following through with them
• Flexibility
• Response inhibition (the ability to stop yourself from getting distracted)
• Emotional control
• Sustained attention
• Goal-directed persistence (having a goal, sticking to it, and completing it)
• Metacognition (understanding your own thought processes)

“Keeping track of time involves a number of these (skills), such as flexibility, sustained attention, time management, goal-directed persistence and metacognition,” Ciardiello says. In other words, time blindness is related to executive functioning. And since that’s where ADHDers tend to struggle, it makes sense that time management is an issue for us.

“How someone with ADHD experiences time depends on what they’re doing and their interest level,” says Kinzer. “If they love it, they can hyperfocus. If they don’t like it, they can easily become distracted.” She says her clients have a hard time estimating how long a task will take, especially if it’s a new one. “It can be very frustrating for people because it’s hard to plan your day when you really don’t know how much time you have,” Kinzer says.

Tips for Managing Time Blindness

If you’re struggling with the frenzy that time blindness can cause in your life, our experts have some tips:

• Put a clock in every room of your house. “Visual cues help!” notes Ciardiello.
• Use alarms to remind you of upcoming events, tasks and activities. Kinzer recommends setting two or three to go off at different times before you need to leave “just to make sure you don’t get distracted.”
• Give yourself some structure. Make a rough daily schedule of your priority tasks to increase your awareness of time, suggests Ciardiello.
• Try hourglasses or time timers (clock-like devices that show time passing in a more visually stark way. And yes, that’s what they’re called). Kinzer says using either of these gives you a visual to show you how much time is passing by.
• You might try the Pomodoro Technique. This involves working on a project for a set time (usually 25 minutes), then taking a short break (five minutes or so.) Then repeat that process four times, after which you take a longer break (usually 20-30 minutes.)
• Be mindful about overbooking and don’t squeeze in “one more thing,” Ciardiello advises.
• Track your time on tasks that you do regularly, such as getting ready in the morning. This will tell you how long it really takes instead of how long “you think or hope it is. Then you can start to plan more effectively,” says Kinzer.
• Make a point of overestimating how long tasks will take, Ciardiello says.
• Pinpoint activities that put you in hyperfocus (intense focus that lasts for a long time) and then plan for them. But don’t forget to set alarms and/or ask someone to tell you when it’s time to stop so you don’t lose time, Kinzer notes.
• Get more comfortable with being early. “Think of how many things you can do on your phone if you’re early,” says Ciardiello. “It’s not that bad!”
• Watch out for time suckers. If you’re going to do something you know is a time suck, be sure to set an alarm first.
• Consider ADHD coaching and/or cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) to help you develop time management skills.

Sources:

Russell A. Barkley Presentation at Centre for ADHD Awareness, Canada conference

Medical Science Monitor: Clinical Implications of the Perception of Time in Attention Deficit Disorder (ADHD): A Review